What Do The VALORANT Agents Do In Their Spare Time?
I don’t suppose you have ever wondered what your Agents get up to once you decide to close your client for the night.
It’s been a long session on the grind to gain some ELO and it’s finally their turn to stash the Vandal away, kick up their feet and relax.
They aren’t possessed by your mouse and keyboard anymore so they can do anything they wish.
So…what exactly do you think they are doing in their spare time? No one can know for sure, but here are my guesses!
In this article, we feature fan art by awesome artists, be sure to check them out.
Astra
Astra is a yoga guru. I’m assuming her studio is one of the best in the world since she is the first to levitate with no gimmicks.
All yoga mats supplied are magenta and everyone entering her practice must be wearing some sort of purple tone.
Amethyst crystals, tarot cards and books about astrology are scattered all over the place like décor. Erykah Badu plays softly in the background.
Astra asks for everyone to turn their phones off, so they are present, and ‘in moment’. She offers palm readings before class starts with the power of her golden arm.
She’s brutally honest and accurate with these and after breaking a few hearts clients choose to avoid this service.
With yoga she is overly positive and friendly so even though Charlie’s downwards facing dog kinda sucks she still praises him.
When someone is falling from their poses, she manipulates space, time, and gravity to keep them upright.
She doesn’t tell them she did this though, so when clients try and fail at home, they are mega confused.
As she is falling asleep, she probably checks on the horoscope to know what direction your ranked grind is heading.
Breach
Breach is a massive softy when he gets home. First thing is first, he spends over an hour boiling a meat stew for his three Chihuahuas to eat.
Once they’re fed, he and the Chihuahuas share the couch for cuddles.
They all watch lighthearted soap operas together whilst he spends some time polishing and glossing his bionic arms for the next day.
Once his arms are all polished, he spends some time knitting blankets and small coats for the chihuahuas to wear throughout the winter months.
Some nights he will cook a roast and take it over to his grandma’s place for them to share a meal.
He loves hearing her stories and enjoys chilling out to her old antique radio whilst they both nap and knit intermittently.
Brimstone
Brimstone is a gym junkie. He spends most of his time in his home gym pumping iron. When he is not lifting weights, he is eating like a horse to stay on the gain train.
He smashes protein shakes after every workout and takes his daily scoop of creatine.
Despite being known to use stims in VALORANT he claims to be completely natty IRL.
He went to the gym once with Breach and never again since those bionic arms can curl more than him. He is too stubborn to ever admit this.
On the weekends he works as a lifeguard and finds it hard to keep his shirt on.
Stats:
- 400-pound squats are lightwork for him and he pumps these out for reps.
- 600-pound deadlifts, again lightwork.
- 500-pound bench, no problems hitting this for reps.
Cypher
A real snoop and veteran on the dark web. He is notorious for being able to provide anyone with any sort of information they want.
Despite being rich from his success as a hacker he is stubborn and stingy with business deals.
Cypher will pretend that a 10-second job will take him half the day. He won’t do anything for free and even if someone requests simple things from him, he will return to them pretending that it caused him great trouble.
He is a massive whale in the crypto world and is aware of every coin that is about to moon, crash, dip, or rise.
It’s a flawless system for him, he knows when to HODL and where to find diamonds in the rough. His status as a whale has him manipulating the market himself.
Jett
Jett is a lazy student floating through college life. She puts in minimal effort but never drops perfect A’s.
Whilst her peers complain about all the studies that they had to bury their heads in over the weekend, she boasts about the Netflix shows she binged.
Jett is open about how she watches thrillers, true crime documentaries, and horrors but keeps it secret how she likes rom-coms.
Rock climbing is one of her main hobbies. She is a super confident and talented climber since she doesn’t have to worry about any safety equipment…
She is renowned for this so she works part-time as a bouldering and rock-climbing instructor, she can easily reach those who are mid-climb and in need of some guidance with her Updraft.
KAY/O
He only has one purpose, to neutralize all Radiants. He wastes no time in the real world and remains focused on his one purposeful mission.
Once you close your game client, KAY/O takes the opportunity to restore his energy systems and repair any damages he took from VALORANT with you.
After spending a few minutes repairing himself, he sets his system into hibernation mode and enters a sleep that only ends next time you open the client.
Killjoy
She lives in a mansion, probably somewhere peaceful on the hillside. She is extremely wealthy from inventing convenient gadgets which have blessed the world for the better.
Think Tesla, but Killjoy instead. A massive nerd, she is always in her garage trying to create new tech. Her garage is 4 walls of glass though like something you would expect from the film Ex-Machina.
Everything is pristine clean and there isn’t a spec of dust. After all, she has a small duster-bot bobbing around the place cleaning everything for her.
She finds it easy to wind down and binge-watch sci-fi shows whenever she wants.
This is courtesy of her chef-bot which has already prepared a dinner of her choice, whilst the wash-bots and sweep-bots organize things around the house.
Omen
When Omen gets home, he finds relief in finally taking off his cloak and famous black-blue mask.
He combs his hair, splashes his face with cold water, and gargles some salt water to ease his sore throat from putting on that deep voice all day in VALORANT.
He was bullied as a young boy in school when he was first becoming aware of his powers. Only a few other boys saw his Shrouded Step and reported him as some sort of devilish and sinister evil boy.
No one believed these reports as he never showed anyone other than the few bullies who saw it in the schoolyard. He vowed to never ever show anyone again, instead he practiced his magic in private.
Eventually, he decided to create this Alias, Omen when he was recruited and trained by other Radiants.
Not many know that he is split in two and lives this double-life, as a result it makes him feel lonely.
He attends Astra’s yoga classes when he is not acting as Omen to practice mindfulness and be in a group environment.
Phoenix
Undeniably stylish, Phoenix is a massive sneakerhead. He spends a lot of time researching release dates and signing up for raffles.
He creates multiple accounts and bots to be able to multiply his entries. Flipping sneakers is his job after all. About half his house is taken up by perfectly sealed and untouched shoeboxes.
He buys plain white Air Force 1s and adds his own custom flame decals along the swoosh. He sells these on his Instagram for a premium price.
Every time you load up the VALORANT client he is wearing a fresh new pair. He is very pedantic about this and is kinda worried about keeping his kicks clean whilst you’re playing.
After you finish up your gaming session and close the client, he ends up selling those used sneakers on Grailed for a discounted price.
Raze
From the ‘Colour of the Town’ video we learned that raze is skilled at parkour. She can maneuver fluidly around her city in Brazil.
I’m going to assume with her skills and big personality she is probably an actress and stuntwoman all in one. She is busy on set for action movies providing some of the most exceptional jump escapes.
She is highly sought after since she is both the actress and stuntwoman combined in one, no need for post-film editing.
Being stuck in plenty of dangerous situations whilst in VALORANT she finds herself feeling brave and confident when on set.
Her exuberant and playful personality puts her at the heart of most films as the heroine.
When off-set, I can see her winding down by playing some video games with friends. Whilst doing so she is probably binging on sugary drinks, candy, and junk food.
Sage
Sage is a loving and caring mother. She is selfless and always thinking of how she could be bettering the lives of her two toddlers.
As a nurturing mother does, she is busy feeding them, cleaning after them, and monitoring them 24/7.
These little kids may just be the luckiest ones on earth to have a mother who can heal and *knocks on wood* revive them making tragedy an impossibility.
The certainty of her kid’s health allows Sage to be quite calm despite the stresses motherhood can bring.
She has borrowed some cameras from Cypher to watch over the kids at night, whilst she tries to find some alone time.
Whilst finally by herself she likes to make a nice hot herbal Sage tea which rejuvenates her healing powers.
She rests the tea on her tabletop where you can find big hardcover books on architecture and fashion.
Skye
She is the weather reporter for the entire earth. She is completely in tune with her animals and can sense and feel what they do.
The animals share with her their knowledge of the weather and what they sense. Knowing this, she always provides the most in-depth and precise weather reports.
To stay fit she has her Spirit Hawks lap the earth every day. They are known to be faster than the speed of light, so they complete 30 laps in only 4 seconds.
Whilst doing this they provide vital information to the world. They communicate with Skye to alert her of any upcoming natural disasters or serious weather warnings across the globe.
Outside of her reporting job she loves being outdoors and spends a lot of time either surfing or hiking.
Beaches in Australia are plentiful and there are too many surf spots to choose from. She has her animals to thank though since they always sense where the best waves are.
Sova
This guy loves to play public chess out on the streets by the library. He always wins and indulges in the frustrations of his opponents that can never beat him.
He doesn’t say anything though, not even a smirk on his face, but he loves the way they walk off defeated.
Sometimes he toys with his opponents, letting them believe they have a chance, but with his special eye he can always see the winning path.
He plays for hours late into the night, but he doesn’t tire.
He doesn’t get cold either, the nights become freezing, and people come to play the famous unbeaten Sova in puffers, beanies, and woolen scarves whilst he sits calmly in his shirt.
After a long night of winning Brimstone comes to pick up Sova up and they go for a drink at a quiet bar. They both don’t like much of a ruckus, they just chill and share memories.
Mainly Brim, Sova is just listening and pondering.
Sova is extremely patient and is genuinely a good listener. He respects Brimstone and has time for him, they probably speak of the time they spent in their respective militaries.
Once home, Sova heats up a frozen pastry and chills out on the couch with his owl. He goes up to his attic every night and searches through his Babushka’s mementos, reading poems and journals from the century before him.
In bed, he YouTubes dart lineup videos by Sovas from another dimension to stay on top of his game.
Viper
Famous for her chemical engineering skills she works around the clock in her own lab trying to formulate new toxins and poisons.
Her full body suit makes her invulnerable to the harmful side effects of a lot of toxins. This allows her to explore scientific territory that many others wouldn’t dare.
When her suit is off, she takes herself less seriously and enjoys winding down by binging shows like Breaking Bad and Chernobyl. She is looking forward to the release of The Last of Us on HBO.
She enjoys hanging out by herself and finds the company of others a bit annoying. For some reason she can’t help being a bit passive-aggressive and toxic when around others and hence, prefers to be alone.
She enjoys going for walks alone whilst listening to bands like System of a Down and Tool.
Needless to say, Viper has also had no problems dodging COVID-19.
Yoru & Reyna
Reyna and Yoru are the Bonnie and Clyde of the future. When outside of VALORANT they continue to use their Radianite powers for reasons others have vowed to themselves not to.
They are the most notorious and successful bank robbers in all of history.
After countless robberies there is not even an identifying image that authorities can link to either of them.
They have referred to them as suspect Blue and Purple. With their two flashes they have been easily able to seize control of the banks which were supposedly meant to have benchmark security systems.
Prior to committing to any robbery, they reach out to Cypher who does a lot of work behind the scenes for them.
He provides them with all the intel they need about cameras and digital lock systems. After paying a fee, Cypher compromises the surveillance systems and equips Reyna and Yoru with all the blueprints they need.
With the invisibility and speed of his Dimensional Drift he is able to swiftly traverse the bank to grab what they came for. Meanwhile, Reyna’s Leer means the hostages have never actually seen either robber.
When it comes to making a safe escape with the loot, Reyna jumps on Yoru’s back whilst he uses his signature ability to teleport out to safety.
Meanwhile, he uses his Fake Out to confuse hostages who are reporting to police that they are still there scrambling and stealing.
They always make a safe escape through Yoru’s Gatecrash which he has kept hidden from the world.
Closing Thoughts
These are all obviously whipped up out of nowhere! To the best of my ability, I tried imagining what these Agents would be doing in their spare time, IRL.
The Riot developers have only given us a very brief glimpse into the lore of VALORANT.
Moreover, we really don’t know too much about the personalities and backgrounds of each agent.
Considering this, it is interesting to predict and imagine what these Agents would be like outside of VALORANT.
I’m genuinely interested to see everyone’s imagination at work!
So tell me, what do you guys think your favorite Agents would get up to IRL?